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 Priest + Vodka = bad combi

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eiji
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PostSubject: Priest + Vodka = bad combi   Sat Nov 12, 2011 6:30 pm

The new priest was so nervous at his first mass, he could hardly speak. The Monsignor said, 'Father, next Sunday it may help if you put some vodka in the water pitcher. After a few sips everything should go smoothly.'
The next Sunday the new priest put the suggestion into practice and was able to talk up a storm. He felt great! However, upon returning to the rectory he found a note from the Monsignor:

Dear Father,

1. Next time sip rather than gulp.
2. There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3. There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4. We do not refer to the Cross as the 'Big T'.
5. The recommended grace before meals is not 'Rub-a-dub-dub, thanks for the grub. Yeah God!'.
6. We do not refer to our Savior, Jesus Christ and his Apostles as 'J.C. and the Boys'.
7. David slew Goliath, he did not 'Kick the shit out of him'.
8. Moses parted the water at the Red Sea, he didn't pass water.
9. We don't refer to Judas as 'El Finko'.
10. The Pope is consecrated, not castrated, and we don't refer to him as 'The Godfather'.
11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said, 'Take this and eat it, for it is my body', he did not say 'Eat me'.
12. David was hit by a rock and knocked off his donkey, he wasn't 'stoned off his ass'.
13. The Father, Son, and the Holy Ghost are never referred to as 'Big Daddy, Junior, and the Spook'.
14. It is always the Virgin Mary, never 'Mary with the Cherry'.
15. Last, but not least, next Wednesday there will be a Taffy-Pulling contest at St. Peter's, not a Peter-Pulling contest at St. Taffy's.
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Khorkar
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PostSubject: Re: Priest + Vodka = bad combi   Sat Nov 12, 2011 6:46 pm

Ha ha ha.... good one Eiji. Really cracks me up reading this post.
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asahi
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PostSubject: Re: Priest + Vodka = bad combi   Sat Nov 12, 2011 6:53 pm

Hehe. Nice, Eiji!
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nutty88
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PostSubject: Re: Priest + Vodka = bad combi   Mon Nov 21, 2011 10:52 am

This is so funny!
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4dtoto
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PostSubject: Re: Priest + Vodka = bad combi   Mon Nov 21, 2011 1:23 pm

hahahahaha...me thinking what will happen if Golf + Vodka = ??
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72
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PostSubject: Re: Priest + Vodka = bad combi   Mon Nov 21, 2011 3:03 pm

From my experience, golf + vodka makes for a very funny game. I attended a golf tournament where we were made to drink after each par 3. 1 shooter glass for par, 2 for bogey... 2 for missed green, 3 for bunker.... It adds up. It was really funny.
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bandicoot
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PostSubject: Re: Priest + Vodka = bad combi   Sun Jan 08, 2012 6:26 pm

haha ill like to try vodka with golf the next time
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PostSubject: Re: Priest + Vodka = bad combi   Today at 2:19 am

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