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 Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap

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burnergolfer
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PostSubject: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Sat Aug 17, 2013 12:29 pm

Just read a nice joke & would like to share with you guys! Enjoy:P Razz Razz 



A businessman was attending a conference in Africa. He had a free day and wanted to play a round of golf and was directed to a golf course in the nearby jungle. After a short journey, he arrived at the course and asked the pro if he could get on.

"Sure," said the pro, "What’s your handicap?"

Not wanting to admit that he had an 18 handicap, he decided to cut it a bit. “Well, it’s 16,” said the businessman, “But what’s the relevance since I’ll be playing alone”
"It’s very important for us to know," said the pro, who then called a caddy.
"Go out with this gentleman," said the pro, "his handicap is 16."

The businessman was very surprised at this constant reference to his handicap. The caddy picked up the businessman’s bag and a large rifle. Again, the businessman was surprised, but decided to ask no questions.
They arrived on the 1st hole, a par-4. “It’s wise to avoid those trees on the left,” said the caddy.

Needless to say, the businessman duck-hooked his ball into the trees. He found his ball and was about to punch it out when he heard the loud crack of the rifle and a large snake fell dead from a tree above his head. The caddy stood next to him with the rifle smoking in his hand.
"That’s the Black Mamba, the most poisonous snake in all Africa. You’re lucky I was here with you!"
After taking a bogey, they moved to the 2nd hole, a par-5.


"Good to avoid those bushes on the right," says the caddy. Of course, the businessman’s ball went straight into the bushes. As he went to pick up his ball, he heard the loud crack of the caddy’s rifle once again, and a huge lion fell dead at his feet.
"I’ve saved your life again," said the caddy.


The 3rd hole was a par-3 with a lake in front of the green. The businessman’s ball came up just short of the green and rolled back to the edge of the water. To take a shot, he had to stand with one foot in the lake. As he was about to swing, a large crocodile emerged from the water and bit off much of his right leg.
As he fell to the ground bleeding and in great pain, he saw the caddy with the rifle propped at his side, looking on unconcernedly.

"Why didn’t you kill it" asked the man incredulously. "I’m sorry, sir," said the caddy. "This is the 17th handicap hole. You don’t get a shot here."

And that, my golfing friends, is why you should never lie about your handicap!
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hkhamateur
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Sat Aug 17, 2013 12:33 pm

ROFL ROFL 
Good one bro! ROFL 
So...fm today onwards, I ll tell everyone I m a 18 hcper...Laughing
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wtapz
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Sat Aug 17, 2013 12:36 pm

Nice joke !! 

Golf is a gentleman game so nv lie about handicap Smile
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pushslice
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Sat Aug 17, 2013 12:36 pm

A bunch of my kakis must read these Laughing
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chien
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Sat Aug 17, 2013 2:02 pm

Good joke !

In Singapore most of the time players will do the opposite. . eg declare a 10.5 hcp but play a once in his life superb round of 76 from back tee....  

Laughing
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Daztasiumz
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Sat Aug 17, 2013 2:11 pm

nice share.. cheers cheers cheers
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2008
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Sat Aug 17, 2013 3:10 pm

chien wrote:
Good joke !

In Singapore most of the time players will do the opposite. . eg declare a 10.5 hcp but play a once in his life superb round of 76 from back tee....  

Laughing
Beer
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de_moschino
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Sat Aug 17, 2013 3:26 pm

chien wrote:
Good joke !

In Singapore most of the time players will do the opposite. . eg declare a 10.5 hcp but play a once in his life superb round of 76 from back tee....  

Laughing
typical buaya ROFL
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Branong
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Wed Oct 02, 2013 12:00 pm

Thanks for sharing. It's funny joke that I will tell my true handicap.
Haha
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poresia
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Thu Oct 03, 2013 10:19 am

when ppl ask me, I will tell them my actual hcp but always tell them I hardly play to that hcp. its those once a whole good game that "messed" up my hcp!
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Itsuki
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Thu Oct 03, 2013 2:32 pm

I have to under-declared my hcp else my playing kakis will f me cos they cannot play from blue tee... hahahaaa.....Razz
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benedictteo83
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Thu Oct 03, 2013 6:50 pm

ROFL ROFL ROFL nice one..
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wbjia
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Thu Oct 10, 2013 4:28 pm

this is a good one
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snagy23
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Thu Oct 10, 2013 7:18 pm

I ever heard of e braking! 
Basically is playing high 30s 1st nine. Than 2nd nine played high 40s.
Will any buaya out there can varify? Doubt not! Kekeke
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hkhamateur
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Thu Oct 10, 2013 7:41 pm

snagy23 wrote:
I ever heard of e braking! 
Basically is playing high 30s 1st nine. Than 2nd nine played high 40s.
Will any buaya out there can varify? Doubt not! Kekeke
Yeap...cfm. Wink
Hve one kakis tell me tat on few golf games w him! Evil or Very Mad
ie: 'Ok liao, this ll kept me at low 90s!!' Shocked
Wonder is he in GR? Laughing Laughing
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PostSubject: Re: Why You Should Never Lie About Your Handicap   Today at 5:33 pm

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