Posh Spice decided to help to benefit the community and began a job as a primary school counsellor. One day during break time she noticed a boy standing by himself on the side of a playing field while the rest of the kids enjoyed a game of football at the other end.
Knowing a little bit about football through her marriage she decided to have a conversation with him, so she approached and asked if he was all right, in the knowledge that if he wasn't she could talk to him about the game.
The boy said he was OK. A little while later, however, she noticed the boy was in the same spot, still by himself, watching the game.
Approaching again, Victoria said, "Would you like me to be your friend?"
The boy hesitated, then said, "Okay", looking at the woman suspiciously.
Feeling she was making progress, she then asked, "Why are you standing here alone?"
"Because," the little boy said with great exasperation, "I'm the f*cking goalkeeper - now piss off."