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 Management Lessons

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TSL
Newbie Golfer
Newbie Golfer


Posts : 68
Join date : 2009-07-19

PostSubject: Management Lessons   Thu Jul 30, 2009 2:55 am

MANAGEMENT LESSONS
********************

Lesson Number One
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A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him,"Can i also sit like you and do nothing all day long?"

the crow answered: "Sure, why not."So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. all of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Management lesson:

To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.


Lesson Number Two
****************

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree" sighed the turkey, "but haven't got the energy. "Well,why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?'replied the bull."They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.

The next day,after eating more dung, he reached the second branch.Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was spotted by farmer,who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Management Lesson:

Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you long there.


Lesson Number Three
******************

When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The brain said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and functions. "The feet said, "We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go.
"The hands said, "We should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money. And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes untill finally the asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss.So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work. Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and brain fevered. Eventually they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed. All the other parts did al the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the shit!

Management Lesson:

You don't need brains to be a Boss- any asshole will do.
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Roystonnn
Super Active Golfer
Super Active Golfer


Posts : 1324
Join date : 2009-07-05
Age : 35
Location : Sometimes Serangoon Sometimes India

PostSubject: Re: Management Lessons   Thu Jul 30, 2009 10:22 am

Haha!!
This is good!

Shall show to my company president. cheers
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digdug888
Junior Golfer
Junior Golfer


Posts : 106
Join date : 2009-07-21

PostSubject: Re: Management Lessons   Thu Jul 30, 2009 10:26 am

funny man.. asshole bosses ! keep it coming !
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ralphlim
Senior Golfer
Senior Golfer


Posts : 481
Join date : 2009-06-22
Age : 37
Location : SG

PostSubject: Re: Management Lessons   Thu Jul 30, 2009 11:01 am

what i call CEM - Career Ending Move should you decide to show to your bosses...

Good one... Very Happy
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