Golf Republic Forum - Singapore's most active golfing forum.
 
HomeFAQCalendarRegisterLog in

Share | 
 

 Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course

View previous topic View next topic Go down 
AuthorMessage
wilkang
Course Marshal
Course Marshal


Posts : 2780
Join date : 2009-10-21
Age : 42

PostSubject: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 1:42 pm

A son, his father, and grandfather went to the country club for their weekly round of golf. Just as they reached the first tee, a beautiful young blonde woman carrying her bag of clubs approached them. She explained that the member who brought her to the club for a round of golf had an emergency that called him away, and asked the trio whether she could join them. Naturally, the guys all agreed.

Smiling, the blonde thanked them and said, "Look, fellows, I work in a topless bar as a dancer, so nothing shocks me anymore. If any of you want to smoke cigars, have a beer, bet, swear, tell off-color stories or do anything that you normally do when playing a round together, go ahead. But I enjoy playing golf, and consider myself pretty good at it, so don't try to coach me on how to play my shots." With that the guys agreed to relax and invited her to hit first.

All eyes were fastened on her shapely behind as she bent over to place her ball on the tee. She then took her driver and hit the ball 270 yards down the middle, right in front of the green. The father's mouth was agape. "That was beautiful," he said. The blonde put her driver away and said, "I really didn't get into it, and I faded it a little." After the three guys hit their drives and their second shots, the blonde took out an eight iron and lofted the ball within five feet of the pin. The son said, "Damn, lady, you played that perfectly." The blonde frowned and said, "It was a little weak, but even a soft seven would have been too much club. I've left a tricky little putt." She then tapped in the five-footer for a birdie.

Having the honors, she hit first on the second hole, knocked the hell out of the ball, and it landed nearly 300 yards away, smack in the middle of the fairway. For the rest of the round the statuesque blonde continued to amaze the guys, quietly and methodically shooting par or less on every hole.
When they arrived at the 18th green, the blonde was three under, and had a very nasty 12-foot putt on an undulating green for a par. She turned to the three guys and said, "I really want to thank you all for not acting like a bunch of chauvinists and telling me what club to use or how to play a shot, but I need this putt for a 69 and I'd really like to break 70 on this course....... If any one of you can tell me how to make par on this hole, I'll take him back to my apartment, pour some 35-year-old Single Malt Strathmill Scotch in him, fix him a steak dinner, and then show him a very good time for the rest of the night."

The yuppie son jumped at the thought! He strolled across the green, carefully eyeing the line of the putt and finally said, "Honey, aim about 6 inches to the right of the hole and hit it firm. It will get over that little hump and break right into the cup." The father knelt down and sighted the putt using his putter as a plumb, "Don't listen to the kid, darlin', you want to hit it softly 10 inches to the right and let it run left down that little hogback, so it falls into the cup."
The old gray-haired grandfather walked over to the blonde's ball, picked it
up, handed it to her and said, "That's a gimme, sweetheart." The blonde smiled and said, "Your car or mine?"

OLD AGE AND WISDOM WILL OVERCOME SKILL EVERY TIME!!!

_________________
Golf is a sport to love. To treasure. To cherish.
Back to top Go down
Technospaz
Advisor
Advisor


Posts : 15650
Join date : 2009-06-18
Age : 41
Location : Typically OOB

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 1:54 pm

ROFLOL!!!!!!

Best. Joke. Ever.

_________________
Clearing my Storeroom of golfing goodies. Please help support Smile

"A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom." Henry Beard
Back to top Go down
eiji
Course Marshal
Course Marshal


Posts : 6193
Join date : 2009-08-22
Age : 35
Location : Training

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 2:31 pm

OMFG this was awesome!

_________________
Callaway Razr Fit Xtreme 10.5* Ahina 60 R
PRGR EGG Spoon 15* MRC Fubuki Alpha 70S
Adams Super Hybrid XTD 19* MRC Fubuki AH R
Adams A12 Pro 23* GD Tour AD UT85 R
Callaway X Hot Pro 5-PW PX95 5.5
Titleist SM4 50*, 54*, 58* DG Spinner
Scotty Studio Select 2012 Golo 33"
Back to top Go down
http://www.idealparts.com.sg
mUAr_cHEe
Hall of Fame Golfer
Hall of Fame Golfer


Posts : 7236
Join date : 2009-06-19
Location : Sillypore

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 4:06 pm

My own wisdom that I got from a Senior Golfer.

"Young Man, if you cannot see so far, then don't hit so far."
Back to top Go down
mizzy
Incredibly Active Golfer
Incredibly Active Golfer


Posts : 2702
Join date : 2009-12-11
Location : golf club graveyard

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 4:12 pm

mUAr_cHEe wrote:
My own wisdom that I got from a Senior Golfer.

"Young Man, if you cannot see so far, then don't hit so far."

does that mean you will only hit 3 iron as your longest club? What a Face
like that i can be more equal footing with you from the tees. cheers
Back to top Go down
alvin7379
Incredibly Active Golfer
Incredibly Active Golfer


Posts : 2916
Join date : 2009-11-24
Age : 37
Location : Anywhere Comfortable

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 4:31 pm

My last gimme was given to a old Di-Go-Peh... hummm....oh... that's you Wil! White Flag

damn... such stark contrast... Laughing
Back to top Go down
http://www.visualtech.com.sg
wilkang
Course Marshal
Course Marshal


Posts : 2780
Join date : 2009-10-21
Age : 42

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 4:36 pm

allo...fellow TKP..since when did i take a gimme from you???
Mad

_________________
Golf is a sport to love. To treasure. To cherish.
Back to top Go down
oned10t
Very Active Golfer
Very Active Golfer


Posts : 582
Join date : 2009-09-15
Location : singapore

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 4:44 pm

thats a damn good joke cheers
Back to top Go down
mizzy
Incredibly Active Golfer
Incredibly Active Golfer


Posts : 2702
Join date : 2009-12-11
Location : golf club graveyard

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 4:46 pm

alvin7379 wrote:
My last gimme was given to a old Di-Go-Peh... hummm....oh... that's you Wil! White Flag

damn... such stark contrast... Laughing

surely you are not expecting Wil to make you a steak and then show you a good time for the rest of the evening?! affraid
Back to top Go down
alvin7379
Incredibly Active Golfer
Incredibly Active Golfer


Posts : 2916
Join date : 2009-11-24
Age : 37
Location : Anywhere Comfortable

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 4:55 pm

mizzy wrote:
alvin7379 wrote:
My last gimme was given to a old Di-Go-Peh... hummm....oh... that's you Wil! White Flag

damn... such stark contrast... Laughing

surely you are not expecting Wil to make you a steak and then show you a good time for the rest of the evening?! affraid

pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale pale
Back to top Go down
http://www.visualtech.com.sg
mUAr_cHEe
Hall of Fame Golfer
Hall of Fame Golfer


Posts : 7236
Join date : 2009-06-19
Location : Sillypore

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 5:03 pm

wil will come dress like that...



then prepare steak for alvin and show him a good time ALL NIGHT LONG....
Back to top Go down
wilkang
Course Marshal
Course Marshal


Posts : 2780
Join date : 2009-10-21
Age : 42

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 5:05 pm

wahahahaha...alvin will eat and puke at the same time. ROFL ROFL

_________________
Golf is a sport to love. To treasure. To cherish.
Back to top Go down
mizzy
Incredibly Active Golfer
Incredibly Active Golfer


Posts : 2702
Join date : 2009-12-11
Location : golf club graveyard

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 5:11 pm

this i got to see. Laughing so when shall we arrange this? 15 Aug?
Back to top Go down
blee67
Hall of Fame Golfer
Hall of Fame Golfer


Posts : 5410
Join date : 2009-12-05
Location : Singapore

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 5:36 pm

mizzy wrote:
this i got to see. Laughing so when shall we arrange this? 15 Aug?

See Wil dressed like that or Alvin puking???? Very Happy
Back to top Go down
mizzy
Incredibly Active Golfer
Incredibly Active Golfer


Posts : 2702
Join date : 2009-12-11
Location : golf club graveyard

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 5:40 pm

blee2007 wrote:
mizzy wrote:
this i got to see. Laughing so when shall we arrange this? 15 Aug?

See Wil dressed like that or Alvin puking???? Very Happy

must have one first then can have the other right?
but maybe the puking starts only the morning after..



























because the steak was too rare Stretcher lol!
Back to top Go down
blee67
Hall of Fame Golfer
Hall of Fame Golfer


Posts : 5410
Join date : 2009-12-05
Location : Singapore

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 5:42 pm

Fresh meat??? ROFL
Back to top Go down
mizzy
Incredibly Active Golfer
Incredibly Active Golfer


Posts : 2702
Join date : 2009-12-11
Location : golf club graveyard

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 5:51 pm

blee2007 wrote:
Fresh meat??? ROFL

bro.. you know i know can already.. now all GR knows.. What a Face
Back to top Go down
eiji
Course Marshal
Course Marshal


Posts : 6193
Join date : 2009-08-22
Age : 35
Location : Training

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 5:53 pm


_________________
Callaway Razr Fit Xtreme 10.5* Ahina 60 R
PRGR EGG Spoon 15* MRC Fubuki Alpha 70S
Adams Super Hybrid XTD 19* MRC Fubuki AH R
Adams A12 Pro 23* GD Tour AD UT85 R
Callaway X Hot Pro 5-PW PX95 5.5
Titleist SM4 50*, 54*, 58* DG Spinner
Scotty Studio Select 2012 Golo 33"
Back to top Go down
http://www.idealparts.com.sg
blee67
Hall of Fame Golfer
Hall of Fame Golfer


Posts : 5410
Join date : 2009-12-05
Location : Singapore

PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Tue Jul 27, 2010 6:37 pm

eiji wrote:

wah.. scary...
Back to top Go down
Sponsored content




PostSubject: Re: Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course   Today at 8:02 am

Back to top Go down
 
Senior Golfer - Wisdom on the course
View previous topic View next topic Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
-
» Flex of driver vs irons or fairway woods
» Good weekend reading [strike]about driver[/strike].
» Should local golf course support Junior??
» More Poems For Senior Golfers
» Golf for Senior beginner?

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Singapore Golf Forum - Golf Republic :: The 19th Hole :: Lounge-
Jump to:  
Friends of Golf RepublicFriends of Golf RepublicFriends of Golf Republic
Copyright © 2009 Golf Republic. All Rights Reserved.